Tuesday, November 28, 2006

Listening is the best gift u can give yourself

Wanted to share this with you for a long time yaar.. but then never really got down to doing it.. as i was lost with what i had actually gained from the whole encounter... but these days.. I'm truly appreciating a small thing called "listening" to others.. i mean truly listening.. like every word they are saying is valuable to me and my life... and not simply hearing the words.. A friend of mine always used to ask me how I could listen for hours to someone telling me the problems of their life.. and so far.. all i can say.. is that those people's sharing has made a huge contribution to my life... it's expanded my world my views on things.. and I feel a great sense of honour.. that they are letting me in.. into their lives.. into their world.. and it's a wonderful feeling .. coz in that one moment.. when the other person is talking.. u feel like u are part of their world too :)

something had happened a few days ago and somehow it's been STUCK like a bug in my mind.. and something in me was telling me that i need to write abt this... but since I didn't know what my stand was.. i never really got around to doing it.. and somehow.. i feel i can't just be at peace until i get it out :):)...

I was in this cab.. on my way back home.. it was quite late.. and my luck has always been good that i get these really amazing cabby's who loves to talk abt the things happening in their life... i was telling him that it was my bday.. and he wished me.. and told me that his daughter's bday was a few days before mine.. He told me that he went n bought an expensive cake.. and called his son to come home so that they all could celebrate his daughter's bday together.. at the stroke of 12... and then later that evening.. he get's an sms from his daughter saying that she's out with friends.. and so can they cut the cake on some other day.. and he told me.. that the other day never came.. and he threw that cake away. Felt really sad on hearing this... could feel that ache in my heart.. and could feel and sense that hurt in his voice... he went on to tell me abt how when his daughter was a kid.. she would get up all excited on her bday.. jump on his bed to wake him and and drag him to the cake shop to buy the cake.. and couldn't wait for her mom to put that candle on the cake.. couldn't wait to blow out the candle.. and feed her parents that small piece....when he was done.. i had tears in my eyes.. n wished I had some words to tell him something ...

that one encounter.. has taught me a lot... I'm quite close to my parents.. but I guess sometimes.. as all kids.. i used to get bugged by the nagging.. and all.. but that day something shifted in me completely.. and all that nagging didn't bother me anymore.. and all i could see in them.. was just love for me.. like from the time i was a kid and held their hand to walk.. till now... from their point of view nothing had changed.. i was still that same kid to them... and I found that I was able to see things from their point of view.. n started to have loads of fun at home... joking around.. just like i did with friends... and it's sooo amazing to see that smile on their face at the end of the day...It just lights up your world... I guess its hard for parents.. to watch us grow up and to let us go... their entire life revolved around us.. and to have that suddenly change.. i guess... can be quite taxing on them... prev it's just exams, studies.. etc... and now when all that's gone.. what's left?.. and i guess that's the questions that haunt them... and have this desire to feel like they are needed...

While on the other side.. why do we suddenly change as we grow up... ? I see some kids who are embarassed being with their parents... emabarassed to have their parents drop them.. "NOT COOL" to be staying with parents etc... why?... these are the same parents that we adored and admired when we were kids.. all we ever wanted was to spend time with them.. playing.. we would wait excitedly for them to come back from work .. to spend some time with them... weekends were meant to be time with parents.. outings... zoo.. etc... n how come suddenly when we are older.. all that changes?.. Yeah these were some questions that troubled me when i see some of the youngsters these days...

I'm now no longer sure where i was lost... but all i can say..... the cabby telling me that story.. somehow left a mark in my heart.. and something that I'll carry with me forever...... and yeah... it gave me an opportunity to make a difference to my parents life at another level..... and for that I cannot thank the driver enough.... I told him.. that if ever i were to sit in his cab.. near his bday in May.. i would treat him to a bday cake :):)... I do hope that i bump into him soon.. or bump into many such guys... and I will be all ears... coz I never know.. when my world is abt to expand yet again......

A Small Gesture

I just had a wonderful day, wanted to tell you abt the incident that I had with the cleaning aunty (lady who cleans the dustbins and cleans our desks) and the drink stall ladies downstairs(who sell coffee).......

Since I used to come to office really early ... i always used to spend some time greeting them and somehow they used to strike up a small kindof chit chat with me that used to make my day.. and i wanted to give them something before i left as a thank u..:):)... so I went hunted around.. couldn't find anything so went n got them a cup.. and a small chinese thing that they can keep on their table... then i found it soo odd.. like how to gift it to them... i got a chinese friend to write "Thank you" in chinese wrapped it in a small bag and awkwardly gave it to the aunty... she was sooo stunned... her eyes lit up.. with the other hand she touched her chest.. and went "For ME??".. then i said yes aunty.. for you.. i just wanted to tell u thank u for making my day... then she looked speechless for a while.. and then turned to the chinese lady who was beside me and told her in chinese to say thanks to me... but that moment that expression on her face when she realized that i had given her a gift.. that moment.. is going to be a sweet memory forever in my heart....then i went to a friend's cube and got another gift for the indian cleaning aunty as well...and gave it to her...

Then i wrapped the other small chinese things in a small white paper wrote thanks on it.. and went down to that cafe... and went to the corner of the cafe.. and kindof slowly called that lady over.. she looked puzzled.. and i quietly gave her that gift.. and her whole face changed... i told her.. that they've been sooo amazing.. and wonderful.. and so this was just my small way of saying thanks.. then i asked her if that other lady.. who's usually very talkative and friendly.. is there.. and then i went to her.. and gave her that little something... she was like.. immediately.. there's no need for this... then i was feeling uncomfortable all over yaar.. wanted to like run away from that place... but just stood there.. as i felt running away would look odd.. then that lady with the pony tail.. calls me and says.. come let me treat u to that fav drink of yours... then i'm like noooooooooooo .. i just wanted to say thanks.. dont treat me for anything.. then she's like nvm u'll be here for a week right.. i'll catch hold of you sometime and treat u to one coffee :):)

All the above activities happened on monday... then tuesday when i come to work.. the indian cleaning aunty.. comes to my cube and passes me this very very nicely wrapped photo frame... beautiful... it's small cute.. but i'm was totally touched by that.. and had tears in my eyes after she gave me that gift... then this morning.. i had come early to work.. so both were asking me.. we thought u are quitting why are u coming to office at 7am... then i said i have loads to finish and have to get it completed as soon as possible.. and that most probably they'll be seeing more of me as I told my boss that I would come back for the next 2 weeks to help out with the workload.... then that chinese aunty.. comes .. cutely holding a small box.. all wrapped up.. and she puts it in my hand... i'm like noooooooo aunty i really don't want this.. pls u people shouldn't have given me a gift... then she's like holding my hand out.. placing the box in my hands.. and saying keep it.. i opened it.. it's a very cute cup.. then i went n told her aunty.. the cup was tooooooo good... and the smile that she gave na.. was sooo swweet.. from her heart.. and just blew me away....

I'm feeling sooooooooo wonderful that i cannot describe to you.... coz this one small gesture of mine.. made a diff to both our lives... and i'm feeling sooooooo high by that... when all i did was just ack that person for being who they were being... :):)....